My Life with the big C

I can't believe it's been eight days since I posted anything here, so guess I should post an update.

They reduced my Coumadin level a little. I've applied for a home testing kit so I don't have to go the the lab every week for blood tests.  That gets to be a nuisance.  Hopefully I'll get approved and can do the testing at home.

We sold 2 32 Bottle Dual Zone Wine Chillers and an Antique Globe standing wine rack this week.  That helped relieve some stress.

I'm still having some chest pains and seriously doubt that they are going to do the surgery.  Maybe it's just me being pessimistic.  I haven't heard from any of the three doctors involved.  The surgeon refuses to do it unless the cardiologit is completely comfortable that my heart can take the trauma of surgery. The surgeon said he will have to open me up instead of using the non-invasive technique to help elieviate stress on the heart. My motto for years has been "Never Give Up" but I feel like I am (giving up). Since it's something I don't have control over, I don't know what else to do.  They told me to stay out of the sun and heat so I can't even go to the beach or dog park during the day.  I'm feeling trapped in the house. Tensions here are terrible and I'm pretty miserable :(  On the other hand, I think of all the things others have endured and am determined to do what I can.  I just wish I had a "normal" life. All I do is sit in fron of this damn computer all day working on our store and practically no one buys anything.

My consulting and tech support business has picked up this month but cash flow from it prettty much stinks.  I only do a few hundred $ a month but it all adds up.

I put on about 5 to10 pounds.  I'm staying between 185 and 190 pounds.  I beginning to retain fluid again so I don't know what to do about that.  It's another reason I don't think surgery is realistic.  My sugar level and blood pressure are low to normal.  That feels weird for a guy who has had diabetes and hypertension for over 30 years.  My BP run around 100 over 55 to 60, which is too low for me, and makes me dizzy.  My sugar stays around 85 to 95, even right after I eat.

As you may have guessed, depression is a bitch and difficult to control. I try Very Hard to not let everything get to me. Some days, it is Really Tough!!

All of this is very hard on Pat as well and she is starting to crack under the pressure.  She keeps busy with the store and sits in front of her computer all day as well. Getting out means going to Sam's, Sheesh!

She and Christine go to the casino and gamble.  They say it makes them feel better, but it makes me VERY unhappy and frustrated!  More tension!  I haven't gone once.  I despise those places!!

I need to go out and see if I can jump start our generator.  I should take my own advice and keep it maintained better. I need to change the oil, filter and perhaps the battery this afternoon.  I also need to make sure I have all the fittings for the hurricane panels in case we need them later this week, or anytime this season..

Please check out our stores.  Who knows, you might just find something you've been looking for at a great price :)

Stuff Things and Goodies